Bloody Fish Bits Aren’t My Thing

June 17, 2005

When it comes to sharing personal information, people generally come in two varieties: the closed, private type and the open, tattoo-my-bra-size-to-my-forehead type. Some folks share very little about their personal lives and others can’t wait to tell everyone what they found hiding behind their wisdom tooth in the shower last night.

Similarly, there are basically two types of receptors to personal information: the don’t-ask-don’t-tell type and the let-me-crawl-into-your-mouth-cause-I-can-get-the-news-quicker-that-way type (ok… I’m done with the hyphens… I promise). In other words, some people don’t ask about personal things and would prefer you do the same… and some people will tell you everything and expect you do the same.

So what happens when one of the tell-all people meets the don’t-ask people? Simply put, an instant baitshop is born. The TA (tell-all) person undoubtedly has something they really want to tell the DA (don’t-ask) person, but because of their differences in sharing, the two will never have a natural way of exchanging information. So the TA person begins to shovel chum into the sea of silence while hoping and praying that the DA person is hungry for raw, bloody personal information. The bait floats in the water… tempting you… close enough that you can smell it, but far enough away to keep the taste out of your mouth.

You know what I’m talking about. Someone says “I’m so tired after yesterday”… or “I’ll never try what I did last night again”… or “I’ve been thinking a lot since what happened on Tuesday”. They give you no specifics, but throw out just enough to make you curious about what happened… or what they did… or even what the hell they’re talking about. If you ignore them, they’ll almost always make reference to it again somehow. The second reference will be different, but will reiterate how special the personal information is. What’s even better, though, is when you do pry for information and are told that it’s personal or something they don’t want to share. Why in the hell were you even mentioning it then?

What do I do when I smell chum floating in the water? Nothing. I don’t respond at all. In fact, I usually either find a reason to leave, or change the subject and pretend I heard nothing of the tempting bait-speak. You see, the way I figure… if you want to tell me something, just do it. Just come out and say what it is you want to say. If you don’t want to tell me something, just don’t. Don’t mention it… don’t bring it up… and don’t say just enough to let me know something dramatic has happened without any intention of sharing what it is.

Chum worked for the guys on the Orca… and Jaws came a’chomping for it. But I don’t like bait… and I’m not going to bite.

Category Posted in Human Nature, Rants