It’s Called a “Pause” Button

December 22, 2007

I’m pretty sure that if you look up the word “slacker” in the dictionary, it will have a nice definition accompanied by a picture of me. Haha. Yes… it’s been a while since I posted anything here. But this isn’t the only place I’ve been slacking.

I’ve always said if you’re gonna do something, don’t half-ass it - do it all the way.

Such is the degree of my slacking. I partially blame my neglect on all fronts to my newest toy: a Tivo. How I ever lived without my new best friend is beyond me. Tivo knows exactly what I want and never stops delivering. We spend most evenings and mornings together. Weekends are usually spend catching up on everything Tivo has done for me that I wasn’t able to appreciate during the week.

Talk about your engrossing relationship. I’m such a Tivo whore. Haha.

But this morning I discovered a new button on the Tivo remote. It has two little vertical lines on it (like this ||). When I pushed that button, Tivo froze exactly where it was. At first I wasn’t sure what was going on. I thought I’d killed my friend. But when I pushed the button again, Tivo came back to life - just like that. I spent a good 10 minutes pushing the button over and over again: pause… resume… pause… resume…

And then I had an epiphany: Holy crap!! I can be friends with Tivo AND have time to do other things.

I’m going to check for one of these mysterious buttons at work on Monday. Keep your fingers crossed that the same principle applies there. You should probably start checking around for a pause button of your own. Maybe you can find one at work or home. Let me know if you stumble across one. If I haven’t found another one of my own I might need your advice on where to look.

It wasn’t until I’d pushed this magical button that I had time to sit down and look at all of the stuff I’ve neglected to do in the past couple of months or so. Not only did WordPress release a new version… they’d even released an update to the new version. A bunch of the plugins I use here had been updated. Oh yeah… and I hadn’t posted anything in over a month. Haha.

Well I can safely say that not only are we all up to date now, but you’re even reading a new post. No. Seriously. This one isn’t old. I’m writing it this very second.

I had a ton of updates and requests on Facebook that I hadn’t seen. I ended up ignoring and/or canceling most of them. But man… you’d think I’d been gone for a year. Seriously, my friends… how in the hell did ya’ll have enough time to do all that stuff on Facebook? Haha.

My text message inbox on my phone was 1 message away from being full. My email inbox was three pages long (and half of the messages weren’t even read). If you’ve ever heard my rant on inboxes, you’ll know how strange that is (The short version: Inboxes are NOT for storage, people!! Read new messages in your inbox and then delete them or move them to a folder. It’s INbox… not a STORAGEbox or a ALLOFMYMAILbox. /end rant).

My iTunes library had 1210 songs in it. But my iPod only had 849 songs on it. What?!? How in the…? You can’t be serious?! Oh but I am! Before you freak out like I did… don’t worry. Both now contain 1140 songs (I did some musical housekeeping).

Now you know why, for several weeks, I’ve felt like I was rocking back and forth all day long. It was my world spinning out of control without my knowledge. It was probably a good way to weaken some of my OCD walls. Haha. I can already feel the stabilizing effects of getting the world back in order.

I bet you didn’t even notice the turbulence, did ya? You probably had no clue that the entire fabric of space and time were about to unravel. Chaos was mere days from taking over. Do you have any idea what would have happened if inboxes went uncleaned and WordPress plugins were left unupdated? I shudder to think about the repercussions of a mismatched iTunes+iPod library.

I’m giving myself a big pat on the back for saving the world from destruction.

Damn that little Tivo tramp. I see that big yellow pause button laying on the bed right now… calling me… begging me to unleash Pandora’s Box again. Now that things are right in the world again, Tivo has stepped up it’s sinful assault on my more baser instincts.

“Push me”, it keeps saying. “Come on… you know you want to. All the cool kids are pushing their resume buttons.” That voice… like a Siren… calling me back to my own destruction…

Posted in Personal

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