No cheese… no gushy sentiment. I’m sure by now most of you have probably seen and heard enough of that. Instead, I’ll offer this:

GO EASY ON THE NOG, ESPECIALLY IF IT’S *REAL*
KEEP GIFT WRAP AND RIBBONS AWAY FROM PETS AND SMALL CHILDREN
DON’T PLUG TOO MANY LIGHTS INTO ONE SOCKET
LOAD ME UP WITH SOME [...]

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